Supermarket Philosopher T-Shirts

Waiting for Petraeus

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

'I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I was in the check-out line.'

Irregular Fruits and Veggies: "It's our inner beauty that counts..."

'I guess there are lots of rotten jobs, Gramma...I hope I don't have to clean the taco hut forever.'

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"You don't whisper anymore."

"I shop, therefore I am."

Einstein develops his theories that time is relative while ordering at a fast food restaurant.

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

"I think globally, but I tend to pollute locally."

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

"That's a plain burger and black coffee? But what kind of plain burger and what kind of black coffee?"

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

Hello, this is Cable News. Oh. I'm Mortimer Park. As you know, we only have four short years until the next presidential election. So it's time to start asking: Who should run? Whom do you prefer? (A) Al Gore … (B) John Kerry … (C) Marco Rubio … (D) Ted Cruz ... (E) Christ Christie ... House of Java Cybercafe. How about (F) You? Mr. Eugene Yu is actually (T).

Only One Item or Fewer.

Stratigraphy

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

Avocado Timeline

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't east so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much flotsam.'

Supermarket Merge

Quadruple dark hot chocolate. Whoa, everything all right? Sure, yeah, great. I'm a journalist and writer in an era in which the printed word has been totally devalued by free distribution of information on the internet. Can I pay in prose? Point taken.

'Retirement Training Program'"Very good, Larry! Just one more step and you'll have the entire aisle blocked!"

Artificial Isle

'I just couldn't think of the word poultry.'

If Einstein had worked in Fast Food

"Hold up ... where’s the ranch dressing?"

'Advanced warning: High cholesterol 10mtrs ahead.'

Woman watching cookery show on TV while cooking a microwave meal.

Unbeknown to others, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

'The stuff legends are made of'

Continental Drift.

'Are you sure this isn't the point in which we should stop following the invisible hand of the marketplace?'