Sunday Dinner Gifts

'I'm thankful you didn't make turnips.'

"Sunday dinner just isn't the same without growth promoters"

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

'You can't have a drumstick because this is roast beef.'

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

'I made your favorite Sunday dinner, spaghetti, but since you still have service tonight, a plastic precaution is in order.'

You're the sizzle in my roast!

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

"I hope we can sell everything before it's time for mom to make dinner."

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.' (at restaurant with three kids)

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

'Okay mum, I'll eat it all up. But I doubt I'll grow big and strong on this muck!'

'Aw, mom! How come I always have to eat at the kiddie carcass?'

"I grabbed it away from Larry and seasoned it properly just in time. It's a rescue meatloaf."

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

'Something new for Sunday lunch today - Corned-beef sandwiches!'

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

"It's so nice to gather and enjoy a simple home-cooked meal together."

'As soon as your mother is through laundering the money we'll go out to eat.'

"And that's where hot dogs come from."

I don't do wishbones. I do just-make-it-happen bones.

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

"Since you're into burnt offerings you should come over some Sunday for one of her special dinners."

"Fridge-to-table"

'We thank you for this food and ask you to protect us from pesticides, additives and preservatives.'