Family Dinners Gifts

'All those classes for the boy and still no improvement,,,'

Reverse psychology

'I lost the grocery list you gave me. So I brought home a few weeks supply of pizza.'

'We thank you for this food and ask you to protect us from pesticides, additives and preservatives.'

A family gets ready for their microwave meal on the patio.

"Thank you, Adrian. Parenting is a learning process, and your criticisms help."

"I find it hard to give thanks for broccoli casserole."

Holiday stress.

'Either the fortune cookie cutter failed or you have a lot of issues you're not telling your mother about.'

"Did I set the table right? Fork, knife, tooth brush?"

"Sometimes, God deserves a standing ovation."

"You really like my arroz con pollo, huh?"

"It's blank!!"

"My mother always serves lengua casserole!"

"Dad, are we a minority group?"

"You realize, of course, that a gentleman always serves himself last."

"We thank you for the food we are about to receive. . . even the spinach."

"Mom said we're having leftovers for dinner tonight...so I'm having leftover ice cream!"

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

"Honey, will you let the dog in? When your 3-Bean Salad kicks in, I'll need someone to blame."

You pray before you eat? Just how bad is your dad's cooking?

"And he's a nutritional-support animal, too."

"What's for dinner?"

"Stop playing with your food and eat your dinner!"

'Thank you for this food, and protect us from the additives and preservatives therin.'

"...and another thing, Mother's was never so runny"

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'Robert what have we told you about using slang! It's not 'pass the stew', it's 'pass the stewart!''

'Must you say screwpull at the table?'

"Coco, stop eating your food properly and play with it like your brothers!"

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

'Don't be such a baby! You can't even taste them.'

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"Your story would have been better at 2x speed."

"What's a good time for dinner, let's sync up our calendars..."