Sun Tanning Gifts

Summer Tip #26: Never use your chest as a beer can holder while sun tanning.

"The Englishman goes to the beach once a year to shed his skin."

London Cabbies' Summer Convention

Bad fake tan day.

Wood Stain and Sun Tan Lotion

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

Sunbathing in Autumn

I know you're bored but you better not be doing that rain dance again!

-...And we don't discriminate against people of colour. -I've been on the sunbed!

"Be careful of that sun, Stewart. You're starting to look like the front page of the 'Times Book Review.'"

'Trucker's tan?'

'Well no wonder it didn't work!'

'You'll have to excuse Gerald - he suffers from Seasonal Affected Disorder' (Naked man in arm chair in living room)

A gap between the solar panels

'I love us when we're tan.'

"It's a belly button thermometer. When it pops up, I'm done!"

Sun Screen Denial - I Don't burn...

Sun Worshipers

How to spot a tourist on the beach.

'You're new here, aren't you?'

'Looks like they were sun worshippers.'

The tanning channel.

"Holy moly!"

"I didn't know you liked ranch so much."

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

Darling, you should have asked me to put sun tan lotion on your back and not the kids!

'Medium well, please.'

The Sun Bather

Gym/Tan/Donut

'No wonder you're more tanned than I am - you are nearer the sun!'

'Please don't cover me with hot sand, Dear. It makes my skin so oily.'

One isn't snubbing One's wedding, One is merely celebrating One's wedding by topping up One's tan.

"Rare, medium or well done?"

'Do you want it set for light, medium or butterball?'

"I smell bacon. Are you wearing sunscreen?"