Sumo Wrestling Fan With A Sense Of Humor Pillows

101 uses of a dead cat: sumo diaper.

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

"Full disclosure—I really need this hug."

...My feng shui would be incompatible with your sumo wrestling.

Sumo Love.

'Anyone else want to get up and leave before the game is over?'

Future Wrestler

Joe hasn't been the same since training for that new biathlon--bronco busting and sumo wrestling.

Niche Extracurriculars

'I found this bag of salad hidden in the locker room - who's is it?'

'It was all ball!'

Mr. Macho at the game... and after the game is over.

Jewish man walks into a restaurant called 'Oy Sushi'.

'Why do you always have to make a spectacle of yourself.'

'...Do the Hokey-Pokey and turn yourselves around...'

'It says on your resume, the reason for dismissal from your last employer was the sleeper hold.'

Two champagne bottles fight in a headlock

"I'm gonna twist you like a balloon animal."

'He wanted to know if anyone had ever brought out a keep-fat video.'

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

'What do we think? We think it's foolish to skip obedience school and go straight to the NBS...'

'And once again it's ended in a tie.'

"They call you Abominable and me a monster, and they don't even know us."

"Their lawyer found out that I enjoy reading poetry, and that I also like to watch professional wrestling. They're calling it a conflict of interests."

'Eat up son, or you won't grow to be big and fat, like your father.'

"Three falls, a knockout, a submission, or a note from your mother...."

"You both know the rules, no kicking, no biting, no gouging, and no mushy stuff"

Another use for retired sumo wrestlers: Roundabout ahead.

'Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can pretend to beat up your dad!'

'Quick! The NINE iron!!'