Suburban Skeptics Pillows

'You might think it's your roof, but it's really my yard.'

"He loves his leaf blower."

"I packed the cooking gear like you told me, Dad...where do I plug it in?"

"When the heck did leaf blowers become grass blowers?!"

"No religious nuts!"

"To cross street, push button, wait for walk signal, wait, wait some more."

Autumn Leaves

Intentional Community vs. Community of Sheer Happenstance

Poker Moms

Opium Den 2019

Suburban blues legends

"My teacher says I lack 'intellectual curiosity,' whatever that is."

Country Mouse and City Mouse Meet Suburb Mouse

'Well, that's just great...zombies! There goes the neighbourhood!'

'And me fresh out of xanax.'

"We thought a soulless, desolate community would be good for the kids."

(Used to be) END.

"I'm home dear! So what have you been doing today?"

'It's my first dog house with indoor plumbing.'

"If the Greenlanders don't want to become Americans, Trump can buy our meadow! It's green, too, and we wouldn't have to keep pulling up the weeds!"

"Beware of everything."

Titian's Venus of Mamaroneck

"It ran amok."

"The boondocks R us, I guess."

Mowing the Lawn

Next 5 Exits: Five sprawling suburbs that look so much like each other even WE can't tell the difference any more. Best of luck to you.

REPORT CARD, 'Maybe it got garbled in transmission.'

All-Christopher Neighborhood, Westport, CT, 1988

"Don't answer—it's those pickleballers again."

I hate autumn!

'Every Sunday I thank God that I'm an atheist!'

"I hear he lets his kids stay out all day. Shameful."

"'Scuse me, you getting out?"