Style-savvy Student Pillows

"Wow! I didn't even know Prada made pencil cases."

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

'An essay on what I did last summer? -- I was hoping to let all that stuff blow over.'

Trust

Tuck Shop

"Trust me, detainee orange is going to be huge this fall."

Ladies Fashions - "Money isn't tight - you are!"

"Well, if the test is multiple choice I choose not to take it."

"I'm thinking of changing my parting."

'Why do I have to go to school! Can't you just buy me a smartphone!!'

Graduation Day At A Party School

Lady in Blue Dress

Medical Student

'We want to adopt a kid. Do you have a choice our feng shui consultant can look at?'

'I can just make it out. She's saying 'call my hairdresser'.'

"By the time I count to 10, you'd better be doing your math homework!"

Test Today. I didn't pass the test but I did beat the point spread.

'Take ten years off the top.'

"This is our new one-piece for the more mature ladies."

Designer labels "I'm sorry, but I think I've forgotten your name."

'Do the flu masks come in other colors?'

"Have you ever wondered what I'd look like in skinny jeans?"

"Miss. Did you ever actually meet Julius Caesar?"

'Maybe a tad too much eye makeup.'

'What do you call a blonde doing hand stands? A brunette.'

A School Girl and Teacher.

'We're promoting you to Full Professor, Ferguson -- Here are your elbow patches!:'

'My mom's taking me for a haircut, she want's to see what I look like!'

'Growing a beard?' - 'Yes, not so much face to wash.'

"How can we afford to eat at a place where the doggie bags are Gucci?"

"You may think you look cool, but can you actually breathe properly with that stupid cap on?"

Douglas Stuart