Student Success Enthusiast Gifts

A-Level results - Everybody wins

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

Burning the midnight oil.

"Doing your homework may lead to a job that has homework."

"Can you change this quiz grade from an A to a C? I like to keep expectations low until I blow my parents' mind by acing the final exam."

'So what are you studying, young man?'

Congratulations! All that cramming paid off.

Six Thinking Hats

Congratulations! All that cramming paid off.

"So the secret to getting good grades is to study hard...seems a little extreme!"

'I need to read five books this weekend to graduate - any suggestions?'

"I think I gained weight because of the heavy reading Mr. Klacken assigns us."

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

'Remember me, Fred? I sat next to you in class and you said I'd never amount to anything.'

"Oh, just great, Dick. How are things going with you?"

Teacher boxing book: 'As I told you, today we're gonna really hit the books!'

"They called me Dumbo. A memoir of redemption."

"I need a gap year."

If this carries on we're going to lose all our tax losses.

Study more to pass more tests.

"Term paper?! How do we do that? We haven't done a term paper all year!"

We have the businessman's lunch which is �4.95 and the successful businessman's lunch at �7.50.

'I'm writing my dissertation on Latte Sizes.'

Franchising a program

"There are two kinds of students: perfectionists and procrastinators."

'I'm watching you.'

"A thirst for knowledge, …. That was another of my great thirsts."

The Medical Student

'You need to get your grades up...because good grades are an early sign of good credit scores.'

"I graduated summa cum laude caffeine-free, I'll have you know."

'Who do I talk to about getting a student loan?'

"Two non-fat lattes and a decaf flat white, please."

'I've been offered a week under the viaduct and three nights in a pizza hut doorway, after which I get my own cardboard box.'

Wrong answer