Student Life Explorer Gifts

'I'm sorry but we don't have athletic scholarships for video games.'

Archeology 101.

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'I can't even begin to solve your problems. Talk to a therapist.'

"These heavy backpacks will prepare us if we choose to join the army."

'I'm not allowed to have a dog, so I have to eat my own homework.'

'I'm protesting that I'm missing Cash in the Attic.'

"I came to university to get an education and all I've acquired is debt."

Back to School in Cuba

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I'm beginning to regret taking this job at the local playgroup."

Interdisciplinary studies.

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

"Three more years of high school."

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

Conflating Science and Grammar. The boy threw the ball. What grammatical role does "ball" play in this sentence? An object in motion!

'Add the numbers, divide by how many numbers you've added and there you have it-the average amount of minutes you sleep in class each day.'

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

'Our goal is to stress di-versity while remaining a uni-versity.'

'In general, do the right thing.'

'You don't have to worry about my future any more -- I just downloaded an entire college education!'

"So the secret to getting good grades is to study hard...seems a little extreme!"

'This scholarship application is great. You must have received an A in creative writing.'

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

Teacher: 'As an adult you'll probably only use a quarter of what you're taught at school - which brings us to fractions.'

'My class is so large and my seat so far back, I feel like I'm taking a distance-learning course.'

"Rosalie—your poor performance this year has reduced your parents' investment in you by almost seventy per cent."

What are you looking for in a college? A strong environmental program. Ok. Pick 4 or 5 we could visit. I've got 3 days for the trip. There's one in Ohio. Can do. One in Maine, Iowa and California. You need a good geography program. Here's another one. Where's St. Paul?

'My teacher said the school has tough new standards and I need to improve my vocabulary. What's 'vocabulary'?'

Book of Life, Answers in Back.

"Of course you'll study Latin. How else will you learn the names of your dinosaur friends."