Stripe Lover Pillows

'Are referees black with white stripes or white with black stripes?'

Stripy Jumpers

Cupcake Excitement Scale

Teapot

cat singing into microphone

'Quick, open the back door!'

How can you read that comic strip Blondie? Its about a kinder, simpler time. It's about ancient history. They do the same material over and over. Exactly. I can count on it. Not like your stupid Pearls and Get fuzzy. Oooh, look how angry and edgy they are. They're sooo clever! Your whole gig is being angry and edgy. Look, I'm setting Candorville on fire.

An elephant in an aerobics class wearing horizontal-striped workout tights. Instructor says,

'I'm sick of it: Nothing goes with stripes...'

Look at that getup! What's the matter with it? It only serves to attract attention. But without flashy sparkletarts, life would be boring! You say that like it's a bad thing! "Boring" - The new "bodacious."

Two women in jeweled dresses

Uniformed but Passionate

"It connects to the internet and sparkles like a ring...it's the iBling."

"You were right, dear, slippers, shiny floor and a grouting gun don't mix."

"Respect man!"

Heat Wave Podium

Say it with cacti

Sailor and car

Penguin wearing Slippers

'Forget it, Bob, they're way to skinny!'

Runner with a kick-starter.

"He took an Alka-Seltzer and now he thinks he’s sparkling."

Abraham Lincolns slippers.

'It takes a certain amount of doodling to start the creative juices flowing.'

You're so lucky, my stripes make me look fat.

The pastor forgot to remove his wireless mic before entering the baptismal."

The Emperor's New Wallpaper.

"You know, the vertical stripes do make you look thinner!"

'As the young pretender I had hoped to get my head on a postage stamp'

"Oh, I just find vertical stripes more flattering for my figure."

Snake complaining about the stripes making her look fat.

Thinking about Rugby

Sculpture of a telephone wire.

Asian Man shows chiropodist curled up toes, due to wearing curled up shoes.

It takes very little effort and they really appreciate it when I add some sprinkles!