Stress Minimizer Gifts

"It's all about putting work into the right perspective...and this helps me!"

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

'I have much less stress since I replaced my in box with a paper shredder.'

It was getting worse. Bob's power suit kept wanting more and more, whereas Bob just wanted out.

Late/Too Late.

"I feel your pain."

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

Clients who show up early for an appointment are really annoying ??" especially when you work from home.

A man is in an office, behind him is a glass box containing a glass and a bottle, there is a sign saying 'in case of emergency'

A sturdy hand-hold against the vicissitudes of life: $1.00 per minute.

The Adrenal Gland Answers Your Questions

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

Indecision and Outrage Trays

'Maybe we did pile too much work on his desk.'

'I can remember when no one had even heard of t'ai chi.'

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

"I don't understand, having a pulmonary embolism isn't on his to do list!"

'I'm an extremely general practitioner.'

"Oh, stop hyperventilating! You went on vacation to relax, remember?"

"The majestic way they climb higher and higher until they seem to kiss the sky reminds me of the huge pile of work I have waiting for me when I get back."

"How much is this going to cost me?"

"To listen to your instincts, press one."

A Visit From The Procrastination Muse

'I see Phelps is back from that stress reduction seminar.'

'The boss thinks you're burning-out, but instead of a vacation he's moving you under the smoke detector.'

Man at Fire Escape sees door with 'Hot Button Issues Escape',

'My work-lifestyle balance is shot, I'm either working or I'm dead!'

"This could've been an email."

'This doesn't look good.'

"I'd like to see you every Tuesday, forever."

In the Fever Cubicle

"We don't have a gym, but the boss keeps you on your toes."

A shrink charges $200 an hour, but double chocolate layer cake is only $19.95.