Stress-free Exerciser Gifts

"Gym for regular people" "No intimidating trainers!" "Lo-tech" "Less is more!" "Not plastic" "Fluffy and scented" "No mirrors" "Full service restaurant"

On holiday.

"Well! I'm glad to hear you're finally using that tread mill!"

Still Life With Nordic Track

"I put the speed on reckless. . ."

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

"We're slapping you with a stress suit, pal!"

Psychiatry in the Park

A man works out on a cross-country skiing exercise machine.

'...but you can't keep imagining you're going downhill!'

"10,000 steps a day? I can do that."

'No sweat shop'

'...Then touch your toes twenty times.'

"This can't be right. I was supposed to lose 20 lbs before my next annual exam - maybe I should postpone my appointment for ... another year."

"Can we just order pizza for Thanksgiving this year?"

'Oh...you actually meant bedroom gymnastics.'

"Man, that instructor kicked my butt today."

"I quit worrying. I've gone 100% non-non and completely free-free."

"I'm burning my little black dresses and moving upstate."

"Set it on 'slow'."

'Call me lazy if you want, but I wouldn't trade my life with anybody else's...'

Dog on skates.

"He's busy exercising the goldfish at the moment.

"The mower isn't smart, but I am. I disabled its self propel so that he would get a good workout."

'Hey, we have one of those. You hang your laundry on it.'

Exercise Classes for the over 60s - Pottering 8pm.

Simple Pleasures of the Non-Commuter

'It's not as convenient, but bagged water is half the price of bottled.'

'Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! ...'

"I say, if you're wearing yoga pants, it counts as a yoga pose.

'Well, I guess there's another burnt out employee, call H.R., Miss Higgins!'

'The idea is to make food itself my motive to shape up.'

'Right, your anti-stress medication now that was mygloxin, but we can give you 'easicalm' or 'staylow' in red or green tablets, and then there's...'

"Honestly, ever since I withdrew from the world and submerged myself in videos of round animals, I've been feeling so much better!"

Hassle Free Zone: Let's keep it that way.