
"His majesty wants to binge-watch some comedy. Can you whip up 10 hours of new material?"
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"His majesty wants to binge-watch some comedy. Can you whip up 10 hours of new material?"
"For a minimal fee, you can upgrade to, 'predict-plus' and go add-free!"
Trial by Media
News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!
"Well, how do things look from where you sit?"
"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."
Gay Times...
If nobody had invented graphics
'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'
"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."
"Now we move over to the sports desk."
'Pigs feet, sir?' 'Are they pickled?'
"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"
"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."
Presidential Pooch Meets The Press
The President Elect approved by 3 out of 4 talk show hosts!
Local News in Heaven
Reporter #6: television.
Tarzan has gone into advertising. He's king of the jingle now.
The Freedom of the Press is Worth Fighting For!
'...and this time Gerald, don't refer to the RBS as the Ripoff Bonus Scheme!'
Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.
Coming up: Bush and Kerry will debate on 'saturday night live'...and whoever gets the most laughs will be the winner.'
"Wow. . . is that you, Mr Erdogan. . . Mr Kim Jong-un. . . Mr Putin. . . Mr Maduro. . . Mr. Bin-Salman. . . Mr al-Assad. . ."
'That's correct Shaun. The government is comprised of 5 branches...the executive, legislative, judicial, lobbyist and media.'
"I'm still not sure if we've hired a creative genius or a complete cretin."
Free press.
Dyslexia is no longer a disorder...
Sisyphean task with the free press.
"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"
"I prefer to keep my op-ed article anonymous. I'm Trump's conscience."
Classic News.
"We cancelled Netfix for this?"
"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"
"And, if elected, I promise to put more black people in cartoons."
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