Strategic Storyteller Gifts

'Company wargames weekend 1986.'

"Our market research predicts this product mascot will be irresistible to both men and women..."

A Hole in the Dike

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"So, you want to work at our firm, Eh?"

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

"Skip the funny voices tonight—O.K., Dad?"

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

"He'll never win this negotiation. He's saddled with numbers...but we have anecdotes."

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

'I'm glad you're reading my night night story. Dad being a tax attorney only reads chapter 11.'

Of course, we have to begin with certain assumptions. Let's assume I'm right and you're wrong.

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"A homeless person ate my homework."

"Start with a Spanish doubloon. Those are always good."

"Now the board will hear from Todd from Accounting with his free verse composition 'My Mistress, Brash and Beguiling – the Third Quarter Numbers.'"

Mother changing the words to 'this little piggy' to be more healthy

Wall of Office Memories

"I called for you creative people because I feel it's time to begin my autobiography."

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

'With the economy the way it is, there's no silver lining. In fact we sold that last week!'

'My office is always open to you Charles, at least until maintenance repairs the door lock.'

Crafty Beer: "I'm making a scrapbook of when you were still fermenting."

"This is the deluxe edition Annual Report Director's Cut with restored graphs and alternative endings."

'Who else have I written for? Ridge Park Avenue, 7th Street, Elm Road, Thornwood Drive...'