Storytelling Genius Gifts

Alfred Hitchcock

I should be a writer when I grow up...

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

Swan Fairy Tales

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

J. R. R. Tolkien

I have an idea - Let's sit around the campfire and watch scary movies on our iPads!

The Demise of Tinkerbell

William Shakespeare sitting at a desk

The ghosts of Christmas yet to come.

'My 'What I Did Over The Weekend' report is about my hunting a 17,000 pound moose, deep inside Canada.Some or all of this report has been fictionalized for dramatic purposes.'

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

The Proust of Twitter

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

'This scholarship application is great. You must have received an A in creative writing.'

"Quick! The ideas are hatching!"

I wonder what kind of wizard or vampire my husband will be

"Your editor called again to see if the well was still dry."

"Welcome to Sugar Free Farm! The reality show, where celebs go cold turkey on their sugar addictions for two weeks."

'What have you got for the man who knows everything?'

Sign in doctors office - Malpractice Makes Perfect.

"Name your sources."

'Right so lets be clear, when you said my book was a turgid reworking of a sad collection of hackneyed ideas you actually meant that it was a groundbreaking work of originality and genius...'

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."

'Tommy's book reports are like no other.'

"...And I like how you switched from the first person narrative to third person—impressive." "Thanks."

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

We never got anything done around here until we invented verbs.

My Spam Sketchbook

"It doesn't say, Son, whether or not Noah wore a captain's hat."

Santa's Helpers

It was then that Cervantes was inspired.