Story Analysis T-Shirts

'As I see it, Pinocchio was motivated by a need to prove himself while both hansel and Gretel were driven by an inborn rebelliousness.'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Now I really hate poetry."

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

Silence of the Chickens...

Santa, Alien, Easter Bunny and Sasquatch plan the perfect caper.

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

Characters jumping out of a book.

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"I'm the bad guy..."

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

"That's five votes for In The Midst of Winter....three votes for The Hollow Ground....and, again, one vote for Moby-Dick."

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

"We need to stop sharing one set of clothes."

Turning Japanese: I really think so.

Moby Dick

"You're ruining our reputation, Bob!"

'What can you wish for?!... Oh, I don't know... Infinite wealth, beautiful women throwing themselves at your feet, fame and admiration, perhaps?... But, don't let me influence you.'

"And next up, Fairy Tales: FolkLORE or FolkLIES!"

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

100 best beheadings

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

"Before I fight this dragon and rescue you, can I ask a few questions? Like, do you want kids? What's your passion? Where is 'home' to you? Do you have a financial philosophy?"

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

My Aunt's Left Hook Expels Uriah From The Chaise

Book publishing.

'Of course he didn't believe the stork story. Try telling him we made him with a 3D printer.'

'That's my weird Uncle Benny. He claims that he was abducted by aliens in white lab coats.'

Horny Nanny Seeks Lonely Goat Herd.

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

'Tarzan's younger brother, Ed, was raised by sloths.'