Analyzing Stories T-Shirts

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

"Now I really hate poetry."

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

"That's five votes for In The Midst of Winter....three votes for The Hollow Ground....and, again, one vote for Moby-Dick."

"I'm the bad guy..."

"Next time be more careful where you put the decimal point!"

100 best beheadings

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

"And next up, Fairy Tales: FolkLORE or FolkLIES!"

Don Quixote

My Aunt's Left Hook Expels Uriah From The Chaise

Book publishing.

"Oh my goodness. My lecture on John Donne has just been awarded Most Pizzazzy Metaphysical Lecture of the Year."

"'City Slickers' was O.K., but, let's face it, it was no 'Claire's Knee.'"

The Truth

"I want to try other kinds of fruit."

'can you breath some life into this?'

"I preferred the graphic novel of the origin story of the original prequel."

'I suspect the cow jumping over the moon is an illusion or swamp gas.'

'Tonight's special presentation, 'The Myth of the Mafia,' was made possible by a grant from the Gambino family.'

Jack and the Beanie stock.

"Now THAT'S what I call a surprise ending!!"

"How come Dracula's hair looked so neat if he can't look in a mirror"

'The only thing that made sense was the violence.'

"It says God created heaven and earth, then there was light. Why didn't He do it the other way round, when He could see what He was doing?"

'As I see it, Pinocchio was motivated by a need to prove himself while both hansel and Gretel were driven by an inborn rebelliousness.'

The movie was over. But not for Bob.

The cinema of the Absurd.

"What do the know!"

The Three Passive/Aggressive, Co-Enabling, Chemically-Dependent Billy Goats Gruff