Stoic Enthusiast Gifts

Seneca

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

Something tells me it's not going to be a good school report!

"I've been reading a book of famous quotations. It's amazing how many are by a famous Greek named Anonymous."

'I really hate cleaning this thing.'

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

"Tia Carmen, did you ever wish summer was over...so you could be in school?"

'I suppose you're entitled to your opinion, but I still say that Shemp was the greatest of them all.'

'Quotes, woof, woof, woof, woof, closed quotes.'

Frog Prince thinks: 'A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horsefly.'

X-RAY

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

'Take two asprin and stick your head in the the sand.'

'He was a Stoic's Stoic.'

"If Marcus Aurelius himself were standing here today, I'm sure he would agree this suit reflects perfectly your stoic sensibilities."

"He was always loyal and insisted on being buried with his stilts..."

"It is as I feared, Mr. Moran. It's definitely a stiff upper lip."

'This low-alcohol beer doesn't taste bad with a scotch in it.'

'Water is a valuable good and we should use it sparingly. That's why I'd like my Scotch straight.'

"I'm very proud. Someone I've been stalking has been nominated for an Academy Award."

Homer

Through thick and thin, John always managed to keep a stiff upper lip.

"Son, talk loudly and carry a big shtick.

"Everyone says I'm crazy and avoids me because I don't panic despite of corona, climate change or inflation. . ."

'I hope you're hungry.'

"Did you say something? I thought I heard a sound bite."

The Moe Howard Installation

Fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice, you may be qualified to go to law school!

'Assuming moral absolutes - good dog.'

"Have I told you about the time I buried my head in the sand and struck oil?"

"Here's a free tip for you, kid: learn how to brood. Most people in the world mistake it for depth."

'Jack, you need to start thinking outside the box.'

This Sand Is sooo...Scrumptious.

"The dishes are done. You can come out now."