Stock Hoarder Gifts

'Look, if we're going to make this business work, we need to stop eating all the stock.'

'That's our mission statement.'

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

"All my stuff is 'Rosebud'."

"Enough with the garage sales, Harold."

"If we get a bigger place, we'll just accumulate more giraffes."

"When I opened my cupboards at home they were full of junk food, when I opened my mailbox it was full of junk mail. I'm always afraid to open my portfolio balance."

"Did you hear? It turns out old power cords are really valuable! Good things Dad kept them!"

'With these crazy markets, you have to diversify to protect your money. Put some under your mattress, some in your sock drawer, maybe some in a hole in the yard...'

Amazon Prime Day ~ The Aftermath

"Harry Potter and the chamber of obsolete electronics."

"Honey, are you hoarding lawyers again?"

'Oh good, it looks like the few things I ordered from the catalogue have arrived.'

'If it's my food supply for the winter then its different from hoarding.'

Everyday is cyber Monday.

"We do have a wonderful art collection, but it has taken over somewhat: We either need to have a bower or get professional help..."

'Still saving money to finish that nose job eh?'

"We saved all your old diapers."

"Oh, good! Lucille is sending me some stuff!"

Bad News Headlines: War in Iraq...Largest Peace Time Deficit.

The gold price chart.

"My financial advisor says buy gold"

"I take it you've never had a bank account before?"

'Give me all your free pens too!'

'In other news, gold is headed higher, according to some fool who's put every last dollar into gold stocks and futures.'

Recycling bins for glass, paper, metal and IDEAS.

'Look what the neighbors were selling!'

"If they're going to try and take more of my money on taxes have a good night to move abroad I'm not paying my taxes somewhere else!"

"One man's trash is another man's treasure. But in your case, another man's trash is ow your trash."

The Online Shopaholic

"Aside from the hours of DVR'ed shows you have yet to watch, what else keeps you together?"

'He's so proud of his art collection.'