Stimulus Seeker Gifts

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

'Is that the sweet smell of success or some imitation air freshener?'

Go team!

The Little Search Engine Who Could: 'I think I can...I think I can...'

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

Go! Means NOW!

Teamwork!

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

'Congratulations on breaking through the glass ceiling of the company downstairs. However, I will be sending you a repair bill.'

"Only three more miles and tonight we're good for tiramisu!"

"Well, I'm sad for Gloria...she's gonna be bummed out when I'm twice as successful as she is."

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

Upward Progress

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

"The more coffee I drink, the more these motivational posters make sense."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

Pity vs. Bragging and Public Relations

"Bad morning. I was running late and skipped my coffee, diet soda, energy drink and Ritalin."

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

Stresses Can Have a Motivating Effect...If They Don't Kill You!

'If I may say so, business is booming.'

Win - win

'That's the first cubicle I ever worked in.'

I'm looking forward tot he day we can afford some real statues for this place.

"No, I'm not really a CEO. I just like to keep up with the Joneses."

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

"Motivational seminars are too expensive. Just buy stronger coffee."

The rope to success.