Stick Polisher Extraordinaire T-Shirts

"I have a Bachelor's degree from Columbia, an MBA from Stanford, six years experience, and I'm a hell of a mouser."

"Your answers sound rehearsed."

Tortoise polishing his shell

"I told you not to polish the car too much."

"I can work for twelve straight hours without needing to be recharged."

"Well, there's your problem right there -- you need to sauté the onions in white wine before adding the ginger."

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

Man throwing stick for dog

'Hows it coming?'

Houston gets serious about cleaning up space junk

'Yes, I have an MBA, A Mistress of Business Administration.'

"You're right, Pierre, they are licking their plates."

Bald man polishing head

"One of my strengths as an employee is my ability to multitask."

'No, it's not a spit polish. I just really hate your shoes.'

"Just when did you leave your last job?"

"...I'm available for interview, at your convenience!"

'Assuming moral absolutes - good dog.'

'Great draft. It just needs a little exfoliation.'

Online Dating

'D-plus? -- I demand a recount!'

'I'm sorry, Mr. Pringle, you failed the acid test. We won't be hiring you.'

I love hockey!

'You're exactly the kind of person we'd like to hire - to be replaced by a computer.'

Main St Ottowa

'A f-funny thing happened on the way past a classic car dealer...'

Just a regular Sunday afternoon,

'Careful, I went absolutely mad and polished everything.'

Church sign states congregation can't decide on carpet color.

"You never even complimented me on my nice polished floor."

Rudolph the brown-nose reindeer.

"I don't fetch sticks, I acquire them."

Oxy clean.