Stethoscope Saver Gifts

Doctor monitoring his own heart attack.

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

'Could you be more specific than you feel zucky?'

His temperature appears to rise and fall with the FT index

"Me? I have a strong urge to devote my life to making the world a better place for all humanity."

"Well, of course it's plastic!"

Global warming causes widespread flooding, but fortunately scientists were able to locate the giant plug on the ocean floor.

"I came up through the ranks."

A collective sigh of relief.

Coastguard

"The hardest thing about learning to tumble is the floor."

Doctor Flattened By The ER Rush

"No wonder I'm getting feedback!"

'Remember, rising sea levels will raise all boats.'

"No, no, that won't be necessary-they're doing a pretty good job on themselves."

'Oh - It's you.'

'I don't know what happened! All I did was say I went into medicine for the money!'

From trash to treasure

"Well done Carson! This could be the answer to our bed shortage problems!"

Coronavirus and Atlas

"Sorry, I'm only allowed to save humans, not refugees. Here in the EU we've got humanitarian values, you know?"

Protection for the world

"Temperatures are rising."

Seminars for Sycophants

Well at least we can handle these rocks.

'I'm thinking of cutting my hours down to 24/7.'

'He still hasn't got the hang of it.'

"The thing is - nobody loves me..."

Brain Check

'They're stereo!'

"What I said was that we are committed to solving the problem... not to actually solving it!"

Surgical Appliance Factory

"I didn't hire a photographer. I thought we'd save a few bob by just taking, wedding selfies."

The rich paying their way out of pollution.

'The good news is he won't survive to say 'I told you so'.'