Surgical Stocking Saver Gifts

Surgical Appliance Factory

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

His temperature appears to rise and fall with the FT index

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

A centipede's Christmas stockings

"At this rate I'll be delivering all gift certificates, gift cards and I.O.U.s!"

'You'll be awake during the entire procedure...but no peeking!'

Dermatology: Journal of Itchcraft.

'I know we're all terrified of malpractice suits, Bob, but as plastic surgeons, I think we can do a little more than just 'style his hair and call it a day.''hair

Joint Replacement Specialist has 3 boxes on desk: "Hip", "Hip", "Hooray."

Cash Rebate

'We've passed into the fourth dimension, professor! And look, old socks as far as the eye can see!'

Christmas Cow.

Pathology.

Surgery / Canteen - The perplexities of priorites.

'I'll try to get sent off early luv, so I can take you to the hospital for your operation.'

Gentleman wanting to know exactly how much he owes his butler

"I didn't hire a photographer. I thought we'd save a few bob by just taking, wedding selfies."

'Must you get new clothes every season? I'm still wearing stuff I got years ago.'

"The printer ran out of ink so that's only a partial list of the side effects."

Doctor monitoring his own heart attack.

Man hangs Christmas stocking on tree.

Santa Claus

Louie's soup kitchen - fly is disguised by waiter in his soup.

Ruth the vet had become very attached to one of her patients!

'He's not under yet.'

'This is a teeny. Do you have it in a weeny?'

'Ta da! A preview of coming extractions!'

'Well,gentlemen,-who's playing God today?'

"C'mon, Phil! Before all the good stuff's gone!"

'I'm sorry dear. It must have shrunk in the wash.'

How women see it, how men see it.

'It was one of those last resort operations!...

'You wouldn't dare hit me! You'd break asepsis!'