Steak Sleuth T-Shirts

"How did I find my steak? Well I lifted up a roast potato and there it was."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

T-Bones STEAK House...NO sissy salad bar!...Heimlich expert always on duty'

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

'Do you want your zebra de la margola rare, medium or well done?'

"How would you like your steak sir—really well done or raw? We've got a new chef."

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

Honey are you in the mood to fleece a cow tonight

The Best Little Steak House in the City.

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

"I only recommend the 24 oz. Prime rib for big fat guys."

Help!!! I've been kidnapped - Your Money.

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

'We saw the first robin...he saw the first London broil.'

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

"How 'local' is the fish?"

"Some protein with my salad? Sure, put a 24 ounce Ribeye in it."

"...I should have seen it coming...The busboys, the waiters, the dishwashers, the maitre d', all stealing shrimp, caviar, lobster, but ah, the strawberries, that's where I had them?"

'Today, the market did the 'Ol' Dipsy, but recovered in the 'Doodle'.'

Elevator buttons : Rare, Medium, Well done.

'Oh my God! You look like you've see the FTSE.'

Artist depicts cow as large steak.

'The chef says sorry but he doesn't do rare.'

'This morning a rumor that we would buy the Arpex Corp drove our stock up $3. Around noon a rumor that Arpex would buy us drove it up another $3. And in the afternoon a rumor that wo have nothing to do with Arpex drove it up $3 more.'

'OK, sir, sorry that meat was too rare for you. It should be fine now.'

Horse meat scandal.

"Our stock is down. Start some rumors on Wall Street that it's going up."

'If you're worried what to say you do for a living at your reunion, just tell them you recently bought a large stake in a local brewery.'

'I always buy him the toughest, chewiest steak. It shuts him right up for half an hour.'

"One medium rare and one with honey."