Stay-at-home Socializer Pillows

"She's really great. Maybe we can be friends and not hang out."

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

'All right, I wanna know which one of you really like me and which ones are just networking...'

Keeping occupied in lockdown

"Darling! We've become armchair socialites."

Communication

"And I got these stretch marks on my butt from sitting in the house for months back in 2020."

Beer Garden Kit

'I don't care what he says, child labor laws were never intended to protect the rights of children in their mid-30s.'

The Devil's advocaat.

Teleworking was the death of the office party

'I feel totally connected now that I can order liquor and attend meetings on the internet.'

"Oh, no thank you. I’m rumaki-free."

"What's the big deal. . . ? - We've been doing that for years anyway. . ."

"You ruin every virtual party we go to!"

"It's my turn to be 'work at home' parent, and your turn to be 'stay at home' parent."

"When's the TV due back from the workshop?"

"Tonight, I was thinking we could run laps around the living room and then check out that Zoom standup show, but I'm open to other horrible ideas."

'When, son, do you plan to leave your mother and father and cleave unto another?'

Stay at Home, Save Lives, Coronavirus.

'They all work from home now, but still get together for carpool reunions.'

"I've learned not to listen to critics who are right about me."

"Can you turn your video on, Ralph?"

Wasn't sure why, or even what it meant, but sometimes he just needed to make his presence felt.

'I'm actually sick enough to have called in, but who wants to miss a Friday at work'

'Hello? Yes, do you do student removals?'

"I thought, 'Join me in a cup of coffee', was just an expression!"

Cats Zoom

"Re toxing Dave"

"Why is this night different from all the other nights?"

The numerous benefits of being at home during lockdown

'Her name is Tracey. We met in a chat room on the internet.'