Stationery Connoisseur Gifts

"He sells his quills dirt cheap. It's on the ink and parchment that he gets you."

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

'C'mon get it straight.'

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

"Cards to remind people that you still haven’t gotten a thank you note from them"

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

"No, kid, we don't call these 'attachment icons.' We call them paperclips."

Office Supplies/Coffee Supplies.

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

"Here's to non-electric sharpeners."

'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit, today, sir - a ream of paper and a half-dozen pencils.'

"'Original' to 'Carbon-Paper': Do you copy?"

Stationers' sign leaking ink onto a passer-by.

Stationery Shop

"Do you ever feel like you were meant for something else?"

The Pencil and Sharpener

"Hold on a second, Bob. I'm putting you on a stickie."

The paperless office sign covered in post-it notes

it's back to school time, Frank. I think I have everything I need. I have a new backpack, pens, pencils, erasers, notebooks and, of course, a mask. We don't need those anymore. Speak for yourself. Zzzzzzz.

"You're fired, Withron. I got a terrific deal on a handful of ballpoints."

Barnum & Bailey's Three Ring Binder

Man with post it note

Dip Pen

"Remember, 'borrowing' a pencil means not eating it like you did last time."

"I want one of those. He takes notes and DOODLES at the same time."

Biro Diversity

"Who's the new guy that keeps nibbling on my neck?"

"He thinks he never makes mistakes."

Office: Empowerment Drawer.

'And this is our new INTERACTIVE card - you buy the blank cardboard and write it yourself!'

"I think my little talk on 'abuse of office stationery' went rather well today dear."

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"