Stationary Aficionado Gifts

Your daily office challenge.

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

'I'm old enough to remember when smiley faces were right side up.'

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

'And this is our new INTERACTIVE card - you buy the blank cardboard and write it yourself!'

Abacus.

"It has come to my attention that yous needs some protection."

'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,'

When the accounts department took the stationary cupboard Bob decided to book the Conflict Management course.

New Age Office Supplies Catalog.

"You make a great point."

Pencils, Markers, Pens, Genetic Markers.

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

'Yes, the wood on this pencil is from a renewable source.'

'I was 'Sweatin' To The Oldies', and I flipped over on my back!'

'It took months of training but now she'd rather sip a martini than fetch a ball.'

Pension in race with tortoise and snail.

"Doc, I think I'm suffering from insomnia...every ten minutes the boss bursts into my office and wakes me up!"

A lumberjack leans against a giant pencil that reads "Giant Sequoia Brand No .2".

'Of course business is slow. Would we want it any other way?'

I'm retired...I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today.

Shakespeare had difficulty choosing the right pencil.

"I just got home. Let me roost a bit."

"Same story - boy becomes girl."

"Well done. One of the straightest paper clips I've seen."

"We put him in the field but it didn't help."

Speed Checked By Radar.

'Sorry, Bill's out of his office today, he should be back Monday.'

"I know it's a little old-fashioned, but I'm a Capricorn, and I thought it would be romantic if I carried you over the cusp of our First House."

"Why is it that you're always in charge. . . ?"

"We don't let computers mess up your medical records. We do it by hand."

2021 Tentative Planner

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, lady, can't you read?"

'Hmm...Sofa sores. This is becoming increasingly common in fat blokes.'