Starting Med School Gifts

Trouble at med school - "Gosh, it's already my third day and I'm still sober."

'We'll need to run some preliminary tests to see if you're healthy enough for more invasive follow-up tests.'

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

'Well, dad, as a medical student I've got to read specialized literature!'

Happy Birthday to you.

'That was creepy. They ran short on cadavers, so we operated on the dean of students.'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"Gross."

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

"We'll have someone to help you as soon as we've recruited and trained them. Shouldn't be more than 5 or 6 years!"

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

'Madam, this is not pornography. It is a textbook on obsterics and gynecology...'

"You'll never make it as a doctor with handwriting like this. I understood every word."

"That's enough about the noggin and the schnoz. Let's move on to the tummy-wummy and the keister."

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

Proud Parent Of A Medical School Student With Huge Debt.

"Do I need to know this stuff to get into medical school?"

"There is a medical use for marijuana. I sold it to pay my tuition at medical school."

"I'm putting myself through med school by waiting tables. I'll be back shortly to take your blood pressure."

'Pardon me, Doctor; but exactly where did you study anaesthesiology?'

'I would have come to you sooner, but you hadn't graduated from medical school yet.'

"This is a teaching hospital."

"When they said they were bringing in students I thought they meant MEDICAL students."

"To be honest, most of our work involves reassuring patients until nature cures them..."

"Sofia, right? You hung out in the back of Professor Dillof’s anatomy lectures."

Medical students learning how to perform a prostate examination.

'Yes, yes, yes, now seriously, what can we do to improve our health?'

"We'd like to start out being very involved with you but eventually be drawn away to much more interesting cases down the hall."

Anatomy.

'Come into the examination room. I want to practice.'

'Underpaid, overworked, stressed and sick of criticism...still enough of my problems do you still need the toilet?'

'I don't know what happened! All I did was say I went into medicine for the money!'

Medical Student