Starting A Shearing Business T-Shirts

"Just a trim and tidy-up, please."

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

Tuning Up for the Air Guitar Competition

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

No need to be concerned, madam! I'm wrapped in cotton wool!

'Sheep striptease'.

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

'So when the bottom fell out of sheep shearing I had to find something else...'

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe.''"

Shredder.

Virgin wool - 'Clippers On a first date What kind of ewe do you think I am'

"I gained 10 pounds? I've brought my own bathroom scale for a second opinion."

"Well. It DOES make you look thinner."

"Would you look at that! Timmy was overwhelmed at the thought of his first shearing, but now, he can't stop talking to his friends about it. . ."

Celebrating Spring Can Be Shear Hell

"The downside of living in the wild is that I need to shear myself now. Boy, do I now appreciate the skill professional shearers have: it's hard!"

'Just the usual, thanks.'

'I thought you said you'd done this before.'

'Yeah, they're neat tattoos, but they're only visible at shearing time each year...'

'I'm letting it lie fallow this year.'

This sucker was pretty clogged. Found lots and lots of wool. Yes sir, yes sir - looks like about 3 bags full.

Wool jumpers: Meet the author

'Oh Darling, I just love the smell of your new aftershave...'

Nicky Clarke sheep shearer

Shorn sheep gets Baaaaard!

Down at the Local Baa-Baa Shop

'Every year I say, 'Just a little of the top' but they never listen.'

"Will you be posting this on ewe tube?"

'Abandon Sheep.'

A sheep shearing herself on stage - A sheep strip show

Woolverine.

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe'."

"Anything for the weekend?"

'How long has it been since you had a shearing?'

"Well, from what I heard, he was a dog-groomer before he became a shearer..."