Starting A New Veterinary Practice Gifts

Needles

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

"Quick, start the car!"

Go! Means NOW!

Canine obidience class: 'He wouldn't budge from the armchair.'

'Well, what do I have?...Within reason, of course.'

Patent Attorney (invisible man)

"With this company, it's like 'Adventure Capital."

'Where's my glove?'

Separation

'You idiot! I told you we should have learned to fly first before jumping out of that thing!'

"Are you sure you're not holding your breath?"

Dentist Training School.

'It's a statue of St. Francis of Assisi. I had it specially made for my hospital.'

'Instead of 'You're entering a world of pain', try 'This won't hurt a bit.''

"Brian's always had a good nose for business."

'Virus?' - 'Yes, it's a Latin word we doctors use, meaning I haven't got a clue..'

Hanging out your shingle

"Sick? You're not sick! The money I owe on my student loans... now that's sick!"

Infectious Disease Treatment Area

'Naw, man! I ain't never worked in no animal hospital...'

"I've only just started practicing. I'm hoping the proceeds from these first few sessions will pay for a couch."

'Untapped world markets.'

"Ambitions... to make it to the other side."

My lemonade stand went belly-up. I need a bail-out.

'I quit the ice cream stand last year. Now I'm double dipping.'

'Gentlemen, we make money the old-fashioned way, and it's got to STOP!'

'So, if this procedure is 100% safe, why do I need to sign this waiver?!'

'You're worried! What about me? I've never done this operation before!'

'Doctor, you've removed leg bands before, haven't you?'

A dentist places his first tooth and his first dollar on the wall.

Hickory, Dickory Doc...Pediatricians

'Well, I'm AGAINST adding a course in business methods to the curriculum....

"It's a podcast about me and my buddy discussing movies, but the catch is we also sorta joke around."