Starting A New Lab Gifts

Arachnid Research Lab. I don't need to actually be here all the time, I use a web cam!

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

Armstrong? Why did UPS just deliver a microscope, a robotic arm, a huge incubator, a nucleus extractor and a dozen lab rats? Well, it's certainly not so I can replace you with an army of clones programmed to work for free. Well

When Love In The Laboratory Turns Sour.

'How about a toast to my breakthrough?!'

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

Jars containing a Brain and a Brain Fart.

"If we crunch the numbers, it should have zero calories."

Where did you learn alchemy? Elementary school.

'I'm growing mini human brains from stem cells.'

'I don't KNOW what I'm doing -- this is pure research!'

Body by Jake

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

Biologists often consult with microbiologists.

Anton's Bar and Grill

'Don't you hate it when they look BACK at you?'

"Teddy, you call this a 'clean room'?"

“We thought it was so smart getting the phone out of the bottle, but then it went right for the clickbait.”

"You can do it!"

'You've made a breakthrough in FINANCIAL research?', 'Yep! - I split the ATM!'

'Wow! Oh, wait -- It's only a Nobel consolation prize.'

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

"Here comes the super-visor."

"Okay, who's been messing with the copy machine?"

'I'm trying to turn gold into gasoline.'

"I feel so seen right now."

Lab studies suggest that a human growth pill is just around the corner.

"I feel it's only fair to warn you, Dr. Thompson, that watching cell division can be quite stimulating!"

'It took some doing, but I finally traced my roots back to the first amoeba.'

"Now don't expect any miracles. I'm only a para-scientist."