Star Rater T-Shirts

"Don't even bother – this oasis only has two and a half stars."

'This restaurant has got zero stars, right? Every single one of them is well deserved.'

"Remember Mr. Cockbundle is not just a 'customer', he is an important source of valuable and readily marketable data."

The deadly sport of cobra staring contests.

"With an average vote of 3.5 stars, the legislation is passed."

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"'Market Price' isn't about the food. It's what we think we can charge YOU."

"For five starts it's worth the trip."

Four Star Meal

Note to viewers: we've cut back on sexual content by replacing it with violence.

Entry level astronomer...

Let me warn you, toots. Celebrity is like radioactivity: you start with a big bang, then comes years with a half-life of slow decay.

this place got five stars for its fresh food

'Another casualty of U.S. Rating agencies...'

"Good evening. Can I start you off with a customer satisfaction survey?"

An angel playing his harp passengers in a plane holding up score cards.

"This place is fantastic. I understand it got four stars in some blog somewhere."

'I'm rating stuff.'

'Hmph! Another programme trying to grab ratings'

Hubble Bubble telescope

"Starlight...starbright...First star I see tonight..."

"Are you still deciding?"

Rating Everyone & Everything on a scale of 1to10.com

"Nah, I just don't fancy it anymore."

Humans are not logical. A "five-start" rating is very unimpressive when you consider how many billion of us there are out there.

"Looking up at the stars like this makes me realize how small and insignificant you are."

'Is that the picky eater website?'

Love in the Age of Coronavirus

'You're going to need stronger lenses. Have you tried contacting Palomar?'

"Is a 'Five Turds' rating a good thing or a bad thing?"

"Flo, this is roger, an insurance man with a credibility rating of 32. Roger, Flo is a journalist, with a rating of 74."

"At this point cosmology leaves off, and folklore kicks in."

Restricted Dream

Kerry skiis down Bush's Iraq War approval ratings.