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'Then it's agreed. It doesn't have to rhyme.'

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

Poetry repairman

If poets wrote road signs.

"There's got to be an easier way to lie around the house."

'I'd add 'UK' to your name and do it in big red letters...that'll be £15,000.'

Nikolai Alekseevich Klyuev

'I mind my mother, and I do my lessons, and I'm here for the quid pro quo.'

"We'd like to take a majority position in your poetry."

Artist and the artist's model both thinking of the money.

"Since the merger we've managed to engotiate joint strategy, budgets, and client support...But they still can't agree on who has the office stapler."

'I know.. Let's write a song all about the evils of material wealth. After all, that last one netted us a bloody fortune!'

"Try nibblin' through that, you little tree rat!"

'It's gotta be a trap.'

Alexander Blok

"Dad said they'd sell like hotcakes, but they're selling like vegetables."

'The brood mares are coming this way! If they ask you if they look fat the answer is no!'

Wii Childbirth

'...Santa delivers to Yorkshire first...everybody else has to wait because they're not as good.'

"I told you that if we kept paddling upstream, things would turn around."

"Of course, if this one flops we're done."

"Now, don't worry about the shepherd's fire: I'll take care of it..."

"They say you're good with forgeries?"

'Face it, Kemosabe - Nothing rhymes with 'Hi-Yo, Silver,''

Donkey Fights

Hierarchy In The Junk Drawer

"What kind of ambition is that - to be a war poet?"

Art by committee

"I told you that climbing down chimneys in the American midwest was a dangerous idea!"

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Horsekeeping - No. V

"How can I turn $100 into $1,000?"

Out of my Swamp, Comey...!

'We like to cover all our bases when it comes to marketing.'