Stage Swinger Gifts

Baseball batting cage theater La Cage Aux Folles.

'They all want to play the star.'

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

I think you're ace

'Hole in one!!!!'

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

"Does my bum look big in this aria?"

Stephen Fry

Woman crying with happiness.

'After years of practicing in empty theaters, Horace's dream of becoming a soft-shoe dancer seemed as remote as ever.'

Mensa Does Improv

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

Humanities 101. I hear you're reading Greek plays in there. Yeah, it's a real Medea blitz!

Waving from Behind the Curtain

Take a bow!

'I'm a star!'

Cleaner cleaning under the feet of the dancers as they perform

"Thank you, Mr. Mulvaney, but what we're really looking for is someone with talent."

"Take my advice; speak softly but carry a big shtick."

The Amateur Golfer

Mr. K's essay is such a drag! Yeah, but I've got to do really well. Twig! You're such a grind! Am not! Life isn't only about grades. I know! But he's directing the spring musical. And my singing won't get me the part all by itself! English: Gateway to the Grammys.

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

'We had to donwsize.'

Chekov play and scorecard,

'No,silly-I asked for a sand WEDGE!'

'Where's my horse?'

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

TV stage door

Performance In The Bedroom

'Most of all, I'd like to thank god. . .'

"You'll regret saying that, I'll get my own back in tomorrow's performance - you'll never work again!"

"Happy Birthday - I saw this and thought of you."

"My first love is the theatre, of course, but you're right up there."