Stag Do T-Shirts

Bleurgh! - 'I don't remember eating anything that colour...' - 'Ungh!' - 'I want to die, I want to die, I want to die.' - 'Rurgh!' - 'On the plus side, this is really toning up my abdominal muscles...' -

'Oh, so when you said you were an exotic dancer you meant, well,,, exotic,'

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 9.

'Sorry, miss. It seems to be stuck!'

'Bartender...There's soap in my beer glass!' - Man farting bubbles.

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

Music producers.

'I still say it was a mistake having the ceremony TOO close to his stag night!'

'Don't you think you've had enough?'

Men. Women. Party Poopers.

"Is there a dramaturge in the house?"

"His note says the bachelor party was so great, he's decided to remain a bachelor."

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

Tosca on the balcony

"Do you ever get to the point where you think if you read another book you'll burst, but you do anyway, and you don't burst?"

'Admit it, George-you're too old to chase after does.'

"Zero to 60 in 4 seconds. Think of it! You'll be the fastest guy to the next red light!"

Sir Joseph Porter, KCB, First Lord of the Admiralty HMS Pinafore

Looking Daggers

Dutch Courage

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 12.

Keeper giving Lords best position for shooting

"A million monkeys typing for a million years might come up with Hamlet, but they could never direct it."

'Okay, one more saga and then off you go to sleep.'

'Some buck lure this is. I drank three bottles and haven't seen one buck.'

Sniffogram: 'Aww, YOU Guys!!'

"What makes you think I have buck fever?"

'Playing out of tune doesn't make it a remix!'

Ten pin bowling.

'That was a lot of fun, guys. I better get back to my wedding before I get in any more trouble.'

"Next time you drink to forget, could you at least remember to pay your bar bill!"

Stoop Fan

"It's sad how you've let yourself go since you stopped modeling."

"Have you got a thrilling, magnificent saga that can also teach me how to make a bundle in real estate with no money down?"