Squeamish Food Explorer T-Shirts

Somewhere in France - The Eliot sisters come face to face with escargots.

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."

'Is this still America?'

"Hey, …. what's not to like?"

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

'How was your holiday?' - 'Fantastic! Great weather! Great food! No illness!' - 'So, back to work tomorrow, then?' - 'Yeah, I guess so.' - 'Lousy, germ free holiday.'

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

"Who ordered the moose en croute?"

Kentucky Fried Horse

Tzatzikicicle

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

'Can I have a Banana-Split' without the ice-cream?'

"Who shaves the fennel in your family?"

Cheese Secret

"So, I went into this fancy new butcher shop and they were selling ostrich of all things!"

Spaghetti Road

"I can deal with the conceptual art and electronic music, but what are these hors d'oeuvres supposed to be."

'I'll have one regular cheese-burger from column 'A', and one negative-calories cheese-burger from column 'B'.'

Pastrami in the wild

Journey of a sandwich through the digestive system.

'It's the LAST time I volunteer to organise the staff Christmas meal, I've spent three days trying to find a 'traditional' lacto-vegan Christmas menu.'

Ice Cream Flavors

'Sorry Sir, you've had enough,'

"You know they're trying too hard when the chef's special is Corn Dogs Bordelaise."

'What the devil is that?

Okay... which one of you ordered the holy mackerel?

"As you can see, my culinary creations are eclectic."

Early bird special - Grilled Pterodactyl.

"I'm sorry, but Chef Scott feels he's moved beyond that concept."

You have no experience eating lobster? Before I spend time showing you how, do you have experience tipping?

De ja vu soup - 'It was yesterday's 'soup of the day'.'