Spy Novel Fan Gifts

The Anti-Agent

James Bond in a Snow Globe

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

Giant pandas doing surveillance in a zoo.

'Ah Mr Bond, I haven't been expecting you...'

"Ok, I found a secure line."

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

'I can't read their smoke signal. It's encrypted.'

"I want to spill the beans, but I'm waiting till I have access to classified or sensitive beans."

J. Edgar - F.B.Eye Lives On.

"Why don't we call you 'Deeper Throat'?"

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

'Under new business, is anyone wearing a wire?'

Pet Drone

MI5 Press Office

'Trying to steal secrets again, Dr. Figowitz?'

"China Ministry of State Security Royal Infiltration Training Unit"

'Oh, sure, the boss has a menacing evil laugh, but it's his evil sob that I find most arresting.'

"You never call, and the federal government will back me up on that."

"I think Baxter needs a break."

A spy peering round the corner.

'The close Ops surveillance people have just sent these photo's over and we now strongly suspect that Jimmy the Greek is onto us...'

Uncle Sam and the CIA.

Note to self: Call lawyer, ask if he has any experience with charges of treason. What's lawyer got to do … got to do with it … What? What are you doing? Tina Turner. My second favorite singer, after Clay Aiken. She's amazing. I investigated every single one of her concerts. Good times. Wanna see my Tina Turner tattoo? I'm not a Russian spy!! What is this, 1985?! Good year. Tina was in "Mad Max" that year.

'I'm a simple man really beneath the code words and the black ops and the multitude of fake passports.'

'How's the meeting going, Ed?'

"Sales rep from Milton Keynes? You prove he no British spymaster who sent you on secret mission to Bananastan?"

Two men converse secretively

'This assignment calls for a chicken.'

The Spy Who Loved Me

We had a power surge, and the milker seems to have tapped into the CIA's computer.'

RIP John Le Carre

Secret agent 36-24-36 was lucky she was wearing her new bullet-proof swimsuit when she confronted the intruder.

Press spy infiltrates Buckingham palace dressed as a guard.

"So, Mr. Bond, you have foolishly entered my diabolical hall of mirrors."