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James Bond Getting Old and Playing

"Bond James, Bond."

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

'Ah Mr Bond, I haven't been expecting you...'

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

'More government surveillance!'

'Vital mission - movie parody'

"With the fortune we have spent in technology, informers and spies around the world, how is it possible that you still haven't found where the heck is Wally?"

Runner 007 is given a martini for refreshment.

"I want to spill the beans, but I'm waiting till I have access to classified or sensitive beans."

I hope that "golden showers" dossier about Trump is true. That'd be awesome. How so, little buddy? Well, I was always a big fan of the cold war. I loved "Red Dawn" and "War Games" and "James Bond" and all those really cool cold war movies. If it's true that our new president is actually being blackmailed by the Russians, we might finally have a real "Manchurian Candidate." I've calculated that the number of "Twilight Zone" episodes that might still come true has just grown by half a dozen. I hop

"Aha Mr. Bond - you are in my power!....but instead of just killing you, I'll blether on and on about my plans for world domination so you have time to think of an ingenious way to escape my clutches..."

50 Year Celebrations.

Jane Austen Powers

Emergency Disguise at the CIA

J. Edgar - F.B.Eye Lives On.

"I don't need to take notes. I'm wearing a wire."

Austin Powers

'The close Ops surveillance people have just sent these photo's over and we now strongly suspect that Jimmy the Greek is onto us...'

"He thinks that if they really want to smash the stereotype then he should be a shoe-in for the next Bond."

Sean Connery - Resht In Peash

"You can stop humming 'Private Eyes' by Hall & Oates now!"

Daniel Craig caricature

Two men converse secretively

"Your covers been blown 007....you'll have to be called 008 from now on."

'This assignment calls for a chicken.'

"Sorry Mr. Bond, but a licence to kill is NOT a valid form of identity. . !"

'Sure, it's a lot of work being a double agent, but you get TWO retirement plans!'

Secret agent 36-24-36 was lucky she was wearing her new bullet-proof swimsuit when she confronted the intruder.

'Hey, come back with my laptop!' 'Ha, some spy he is!'

Say It Ain't So, Ho

"Yes, Bond, It's a bit sparse, but most of them are furloughed or henching from home."

"So, Bond, we finally meet again."

"Bacon-Kevin Bacon."

'Okay, here's how your contributor's brand new machine works! Now give me my money!'