Spud Lovers Pillows

"I hate guarding potatoes with all those eyes staring at me!"

'I'm going to make a batch of my ginger biscuits.'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

His Her Cakes

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

'Excuse me, I ordered Matzo Ball soup.'

"And would sir and madam like to start with the dessert menu?"

The Inexperienced Cook

'It feels warm enough to me.'

"Didn't I say you'd be the only man not wearing a bow tie?"

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

"We're actually going to grow potatoes on Mars!"

What's the insect de jour?

Your friends pooled their retirements to buy you some super sex. I'll take the soup! Hey, I like soup.

"Wow, what are the chances of that four letter word being in your alphabet soup?"

"Waiter, there's a hair in my soup!"

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'

'You've never planted potatoes before have you?'

'To better prepare you for the future, I've replaced the letters in your alphabet soup with Chinese ones.'

'Waiter, there's a cell phone in my soup.'

Cafe: 'Soup of the day, Hon, is 'primordial'.'

'Ooh girl, he may look like a potato, but he moves like a yam!'

'It's hard to slice a potato once you've looked it in the eye.'

"If you're ever granted three wishes, don't blow them all on a giant body with tiny arms legs."

Mash-Test Dummies.

'He can dish it out but can he take it?'

"I've just overheard the doctor say the farmer has the flu! We all know what that means: chicken soup!"

Dessert

'Anything else, Sir?'

'Are you on any medication other than your Grandma's chicken soup?'