Sporty Fashionista Gifts

'No, I don't like them, their shirts make me look fat.'

"Pipped for 3rd place - weighed down by those eyelashes."

Tennis

"I'm off to the gym, where my private self and my public self converge."

'Mind taking off your scarf.'

Mod Kwan Doh

"Do you have pants in XL?"

Workout clothes: 'One size fits none.'

'You call yourself a zebra? Where'd you get those stripes, in a zoo?'

"I find that I don't need to hibernate as early if I wear a cardigan."

'It appears I have too much cargo for my pants.'

'I'm knitting you sweater... do you want it too big or too small?'

"Apparently, the golf clothes and expensive golf clubs didn't help you play better."

'I like to stay fit. Or at least wear a lot of lycra.'

Always wear a bra during aerobics classes.

George Best

"It's called 'muscle confusion'. First, I put on my workout clothes, then I confuse my muscles by not working out."

'Trainers for actually playing sport in.'

"Do they make my feet look big?"

I've been so stressed, I'm getting back into yoga. Good idea! We all need peaceful time to center and renew the soul. Go for it! I would, but � My workout duds are totally last year. We have catalogs for that.

"I've really got to stop describing my hairstyle as birdsnest!"

Where are they now? Paul Henderson.

"I don't know...it's just not you."

"Don't be silly, Wendy...who would make fun of such cute glasses?"

"Whew! At last, I can eat!"

'My new fitness tracker counted 15,000...Unfortunately 14,900 of them were to the fridge and back!'

'Protein drinks, workout DVD's, special food... the only thing losing weight during this diet is my purse!'

"Know what? I'm not wearing any yogawear."

Football haircuts.

New England kit arriving today - "What time's rip-off ?"

When I said you were Ripped, Bob, I didn't mean your muscles.

'It's the newest fitness craze. It's called 'tie bow'.'

Motor Cycle Service - Biker having more studs added to jacket

I bought a pair of running shoes, and haven't seen them since.

Two Disco Divas.