Sports Trivia Hunter Gifts

'He's okay otherwise, but I get sick and tired of hearing about his lifetime batting average of .325.'

Funky Facts: Football.

"Why so aloof in here? When you're on base, you yak your ass off with every Yankee in sight."

"Did you honestly expect our couples therapist to know when Jacoby Ellsbury will be off the disabled list?!"

"Tom, let's explore why you feel Andrea's inability to understand 'icing the puck' is passive-aggressive."

'We may not agree on the stock market, but we're both Chicago fans.'

"A game similar to baseball was first played in the Olympics in 1996." I didn't think "Jeapardy!" had any softball questions.

Football Fan.

'Whoa! Don't try to be a hero. It's too late for Dan, but let this be a lesson...'

"I thought they decided who was the best team last year?"

"We're playing soccer, not football!"

'If you look closely at the CAT scan, you can see a tiny area of normal brain activity. Otherwise, he's got nothing but a headful of useless sports statistics.'

Throwing the syringe.

"I'm working on a new way to lose a football game." "Never mind, I'm sure whatever it else, the Browns have already patented it."

(Carl's Sports Bar) - 'Hockey Sucks!!' - Although Earl had made good on his dare, it would be weeks before he could eat solid food again.

'Out batted, out bowled, out fielded!'

'Please cover for me Carol. I'll be away from my desk, roaming the cubicles, searching for sports talk.'

"Johnson breaks record so obscure even nerds don't care."

'When pastors take sports analogies too far...'

"Well, if you don't want to talk politics would you like to talk baseball?"

'The fish and chips are very nice.'

The theraputic quality of the World Cup only comes to the fore with a good xenophobic thrashing of foreigners.

'Oh, I hate sport too, but I just love reading the statistics...'

Evolution of the cricket ball

Shot Putt-Putt.

"She disappeared somewhere between the World Series and the Super Bowl!"

'Jameis Winston is going over to the sideline, I'm not sure if he's been suspended again, or just broke a chin strap."

An elephant's memory: not always too reliable.

'What? I've been cut from the team!??'

'See? Right there where the brain's supposed to be? Nothing but a head full of sports statistics.'

"How come you can recall every goal that George Best ever scored, but you can never remember my birthday?!"

'Death penalty'

New inductees

"Honey, you awake? Rachel? Yo, Meathead. Hey, always-wrong person. Woman who can’t grasp the concept of offsides – you up?"

'A question of port.'