Sports Ritual Lover Gifts

Drinkers in pub watching football give wide berth to man who clearly stinks. One says: 'I see Dave is wearing his lucky shirt AGAIN tonight.'

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

Church for sports worshipers.

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

Mixed Doubles.

Mini tennis players playing on table tennis court.

Two fishermen land on stumps. Man says to other, 'Is that enough structure for ya?!'

'The bad news is you're going to marry a geek, and not a pro athlete. The good news is the geek owns the team.'

The Salmon Run

"Full disclosure—I really need this hug."

The University Cricket Match - a sketch at Lord's.

Baseball pitch with a sign saying 'No Left Turn.'

'Oi, nobody gives me a kiss.'

Dialogue about the relationship.

Egyptian Football

T-Rex Game of Choice - Ping Pong

Golf with a difference

"Think of me as the designated sitter."

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

The Epsom Derby - Bookies

'At last they're waving us through - Away you go George.'

I love Basketball.

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

What is it with football and this drinking culture?

"Okay...let's concentrate on discussing strategy during halftime."

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"