Sports Media Gifts

Super Bowl Media Day 2013

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

Trial by Media

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

Occu-Pie Mars

"Good game."

In the Guru District

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

I like the Jets...I guess

Squeezing the Free Press.

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

Football Fans

'Wow! That was some world series, Ella! Both Pujols and Holland were just amazing...'

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'You wanna play another round?' 'Sure....tender, another round!'

'My feet are killing me.'

Build your very own conflict of interest!

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

Tennis fans queuing at Wimbledon.

Rage.

"Portrait of a Lady"

Church for sports worshipers.

Life with a professional baseball catcher.