Split Personality Ponderer Gifts

'Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde...Party of one.'

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

"Needs to get a life"

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

"I have 25 patients in my counselling group...Mrs Sherman, Mr Martin, and Mr Martins 23 other personalities."

'At least I don't have his life.'

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

"See what you get for thinking outside the fishbowl!"

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

The Male Atom: Sex, Sport, War and Good Intentions.

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

'What do lawyers really want, Mr. Montague?'

Max Weber

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?'

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

Telling Self to Buzz Off

The sad case of the blind-men and the elephant.

Psychiatry ward with 'Inhibited' and 'Outgoing' trays.

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

'Well, that brings us up to my third birthday...'

That's no big deal, a lot of people get Siskel and Ebert mixed up

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

Caption Contest TK

"But is it..?"

"Would you look at the carrot on that guy!"

The Good Samaritan.

'It's not just his insane jealousy - he also insists on choosing all my clothes.'