Spitball Hero Pillows

Llama training

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

Jumping cheerleaders

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

'John is watching the game under protest.'

I love Basketball.

'Is this any way to treat a budding genius?'

'Oh, no! A crime wave!'

"Okay, if it hits the wall it's a triple, and if it goes through Mr. Baker's window, that's a home run."

'My knee's in rehab. This one's a loaner.'

'It doesn't look good, sir - the enemy is amassing vacuum cleaners along our southern border.'

Athletic Darwinism.

'I'm sure we'll hear about his hole-in-one!'

Dashiell Hammett

"Yes, I'm still on hold and counting the billable minutes."

Connor Wickham

Graduation Day 2020

'Got it!'

"Today we learned about multitasking while I was passing notes, giggling with Bryan, and making spitballs."

'On second thought, you're right. It was incidental contact.'

"Just play the hit single, then you can do the experimental track."

The Adventures of Break-O-Man

'Do you mind popping back in, to rescue the Sunday joint?'

Cristiano Ronaldo

Stand up and be counted! But watch out for low ceilings!

Henry's confidence was down.

"He downed a hole in one on the 17th, then proceeded to down a further 10 in the 19th hole. . . so where do you want him?!"

Deodorant required.

'I think the dog's about to shed.'

"Oh, I see you found my ball."

The West Nile Mosquito meets the East Delaware Swatter.

Please hold while precious moments of your life tick away

'It's really your fault for not keeping your window open.'

'He made a Hole in One, and a thousand dollar bet he could keep quiet about it.'

"A hole in one... very impressive..."