Spiritual Trailblazer Gifts

"I'm in the market for an easier religion."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

"Home depot."

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

"Honey, I’ve found God!"

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

'You must heal yourself.'

'Don't be embarrassed ? when I first attained Nirvana, I wet my pants, too.'

"Do you have an appointment?"

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

Christian and Born again Christian...

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

'You're in luck. Business ethics is a gray area.'

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

"Show off."