Spiritual Satire Enthusiasts Gifts

"Son, why don't you switch to my shampoo and conditioner?"

'I hope you're satisfied! -- My friend's halo just exploded!'

"It was better before God took up knitting."

Ghostwriting the Bible

'Yes, all at once!'

The new piece of the armor of God, "the facemask of fearlessness."

"Perhaps more people would give heed unto the word of the Lord if the Lord had a funny blog."

'To balance last week's twenty-six point sermon, this morning's message will be pointless.'

Lesbians for Christ

"But, Jesus - you can't become an atheist."

'Look, several prisoners in my client's facility have reported finding God in their cells! Yet you claim you've never broken in one time?'

'We've got truth, we've got enlightenment, and we've got serenity - what we NEED is media coverage.'

"No it's fine, really. I'm just saying it's not very mysterious."

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

"OK, OK, Dad. I'm up... I'm up."

'Don't be too hard on sinners. If it weren't for sinning, we'd all be out of work!'

Self raising Lazarus.

"Hey, this is a good bit- did I say that?"

"It's Irv Pelton, Mr. Mather, from the Voice Crying in the Wilderness Department."

Priest walks by a religious book shelf and and a Satan book pops out to hit him on the head.

'I‘ll be relieved when they invent the aeroplane, these long trips are playing havoc with my wings'.

'I didn't know I'd need a PIN number!'

'I miss the evildoers.'

Angel learning to fly...

Notice on back of bishop's gown - How's My Droving.

'Not now, Lord!'

'Great sermon, Reverend! -- If I ever want to find out more about sin, I sure know who to come to!'

Basic Theology

'It was a split decision.'

A monk finds a little demon in the spine of his holy bible.

"Is there anybody there?"