Spiritual Practitioner Gifts

"All I have is tofu."

"I wonder what we did in a past life that made us all go bald?"

"Home depot."

Cactus seats.

My God, I need to fart.

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

Quantum Psychic

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

'F-E-E-D-T-H-E-D-O-G . . . Hey that's spooky! Why would your granddad say that?'

Giving Things Up For Lent.

'... And your wife says; don't bother looking for the key to the drinks cabinet, because she's hidden it where you'll never find it.'

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

..and with our new spirit website you can keep in touch with all your dead friends!

"Hoarder."

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

'Is there a lady in the audience whose late husband says he never did put up that shelf?'

"Your husband says BOO!"

"The only thing I'm sensing is an entrepreneurial spirit."

Saying Grace.

Cat Seance

"...and thank you for sending my guardian angel to protect me from that truck today..."

"You're on mute."

"Restless spirit, we don't know who or what you are, but thank you for your amazing Wi-Fi, and for keeping the signal strong."

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

'I got one of those new crystal ball smart watches.'

I am one with stupid.

Cemetery: Communicated with your loved one see Madam Zolta within.

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'

"You'll be able to talk to your husband. I have video conferencing."

Spiritual Show Observed by the Grim Reaper.

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.

"Just what we've been looking for...a happy medium."

Transcendental Litigation