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'Poor Fred -- he thought he'd get his hair back.'

"Easy for you to say - you're cured!"

Iliadette.

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

'Now for today's numbers...'Bad Dogs' outnumbered 'Good Dogs' by two-to-one...'

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

Cow of BEEF

"It was the most relaxing massage I've ever had."

"I must have pressed the wrong button."

Norman Wisdom at the Pearly Gates

'I hate to say this but no amount of analysis is going to help; you need a better cartoonist.'

'Look, several prisoners in my client's facility have reported finding God in their cells! Yet you claim you've never broken in one time?'

"She left everything to you. But, the hamster is contesting the will."

'OMG! Is it Christmas already?'

"God may have forgiven you, but Hoskins, Danner & Smythe, LLC, have not."

'What's your poisson?' (Man reading report on Farmed Salmon Toxins Scare).

"Blessed are they who blow out birthday cakes candles, for they shall be de-lighted."

God asks an angel for change for a tower viewer.

'Burf, I think the ants are trying to tell us something.

'I wouldn't worry about a poor sense of direction...'

'That's the one that attacked me, officer! The one with the stupid look on his face!'

"Your Majesty, this learned committee has done deep research on the subject, and we have come to one conclusion: queens often marry down."

"So tell me about your last poop."

Godzilla vs. Himself.

"In heaven there are no trees."

Priests Play Good Priest, Bad Priest

The Awful Lawfuls Chapter 3

"Gimme a break, guys, it's just until I get the hang of it."

'A WOMAN? -- Well, I'll be damned!'

Phill Jupitus

The only place it's okay to pick your nose.

Things we rarely hear: Bow...er...wow...er..um...woof/like tweet, I mean, y'know, tweet/whatchamacallit moo...

'I liked the loaves he gave out last week better. The ones with the little poppy seeds.'

I never know what to expect from those guys --- they're pretty loopy!