Spirit Humorist Gifts

Dead Selfie

"The water changes them back into babies. I think they call it the Fountain of Youth."

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'Just a word of advice ... He's a Saints' fan.'

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

At the 2021 Religious Games

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

Ten Commandments

Adam puts God on hold while texting.

"Seriously, I used to be the staff of a guy named Moses, man the stories I could tell..."

Guru.

Single Prayer Health Insurance

Sunday 10 and 2: The Usual Superstitions.

Praying mantis.

'Meaning of life? You bet! Here, pull my finger.'

When Holy Cows are sent out to "Pastor"

R.C.I.A.

"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."

'Right now I'm counting the blessings that we owe to Uncle Sam.'

Praying Mantis.

Regifts of the Magi

"We're in deep trouble... there are some people quoting back to us what we taught them."

Shoe repair

OM, SWEET OM

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'

'You said I should check back with you if I didn't get any better. . .'

"...and thank you for sending my guardian angel to protect me from that truck today..."

Applause

Moses' TV guide.

Om and Ommer

"Can you write 'To Mandy - you're the best'?"

You may have hired the best lawyer but I don't think that you can sue God because of a downgoing Dow Jones, sir.